No amount of coffee can make getting up this early okay. Ever. I really wish there were adult only freestyle sessions during the evening hours when us regular folk get off work. I will never stop complaining about skating this early. It's pretty awful. I'm so not a morning person. Blegh.
Movez - I did the things and they were alright. My BX-BO Edges were particularly good today as was my Circle 8. What didn't feel so awesome is my bad side on the Power 3-Turns. They felt overly twisty and I was scared I was going to twist an ankle or something. The good side doesn't feel this way. I'm sure the answer to this is to work on it more. Nobody ever likes to work on their bad side and I am no exception. I need to change that. Five Step Mohawks and Power Stroking felt okay too.
Spinz - My spins were really nice today! My first spin right out the gate was perfectly centered so I did another that was also centered. I made a mental note to myself that today must be a good spin day and to take advantage of this rare moment. So I did a lot of sit spins and even tried some camel spins. Lately, I've been feeling really good about my sit spins so I decided to record myself to see how much progress I've made and I was so disappointed when I played it back and it actually wasn't as low as I thought. I guess the good feeling isn't so much that I'm getting lower but that I'm just getting more comfortable doing it. I guess that's a sliver of success and I should be just be happy with that...but I'm not. Sigh.
Jumpz - I ran through all of my program jumps in isolation and then worked a bit on the stag jump and getting the landing correct before I worked on the program. I think I have the gist of it now. Doing them at home on the floor helps. I've discovered that if I focus on my arms rather than my legs I can eek out a decent stag jump (odd, I know). I really wish they were more dramatic though, but maybe that just comes with time.
Programz - Again with the chunks. I don't think I have actually run the whole thing in its entirety yet and that has me worried. I'm just having a hard time connecting things. Like, I have the choreography down so I know what comes next but just can't run the whole thing without needing to stop to fix major problems. There is so much packed into this program and I'm worried about speed, elements, grace, and strength and my poor anxious brain is feeling a bit overwhelmed right now. I'm waiting for that moment where everything just "clicks" and I can blast through this with confidence. Until then, I'll just keep plugging away at it.
I just read all of this back and this whole post just feels kind of depressing. I'm sorry about that. Maybe I'm just frustrated. We all have good days and bad days and I suppose today is somewhere in between. It's just kind of meh. It's all going to get better though. I know it will! This is part of the learning process. But, let me leave on a high note. My leg didn't hurt too much today even with the stags and the sits. My edges feel more secure and I'm confident enough to skate with a bit more speed. Progress is being made! I guess sometimes I need to reflect back on how far I've come rather than obsess about how far I have yet to go.
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