Polishing a Turd

I've been working hard this past week putting the finishing touches on both programs for this weekend's competition. Man, I know I've said this before, but I am not ready to be at Silver. I still have not had a clean run through of my Free Skate and that has me stressing out quite a bit. In addition, I shared the ice with one of my competitors yesterday and she was skating beautifully (as she always does). I'm really trying hard not to get in my head about all of this but it's hard to not think of all of the areas in this program where I am not excelling. I'm not even maintaining. I'm just...struggling. 

Solo Free Dance - Okay, I mean, this is fine. But I'm the only competitor in this event so even if I'm not fine it doesn't matter. I'm still treating this event as I would any other and will be giving it my all but I'm still a little bummed that it will be a default Gold no matter what. The good news is that I finally got around to stoning my dress (this is the one I had to get taken in). It's lovely and I think I made some good choices for the colors. I did crystal AB, Blue Zircon, and Capri Blue in various sizes ranging from ss20 all the way to ss48. I just did a scatter pattern along the high neck and along the edges of the front and back outlines where the lycra meets the mesh, if that makes sense. I really like how it turned out although I wish I would have done it a few weeks earlier so I won't smell so strongly of E6000 on competition day, lol. 

Silver Free Skate - You know, at this point I've got nothing to lose, right? I don't have anything to prove. I know I won't make the podium. I think my goal is to just not embarrass myself and maybe do well enough that I can buy the video of my skate and not be embarrassed to show it to people. I'll update this blog after the weekend. Keep me in your thoughts. Send me positive vibes. I'll need all the help I can get! Here's the video from today's Free Skate run through in case you're curious about what it looks like so far. I'm wearing my Free Dance dress in this video since I wore my Free Skate dress for the dress rehearsal last week.